The funeral baked meats
Sturdy casseroles and funeral potatoes for the grieving
Yesterday my dear friend Tiffany lost her mother to cancer. Her mama, Debi died in hospice surrounded by her family. Her passing was peaceful and she was in no pain. It was a good death by any standards, and it was an end to her long months of suffering. But she is gone forever and leaves behind a large hole in her family. She was a real character, a larger than life figure, and a force of nature—the kind of person that you don’t soon forget. And she and Tiffany were so very close. Close in a way that I cannot fathom being with my own parents, and I’m pretty darned close to them. My heart is breaking for Tiffany and her adult children for whom Marmie was like a second mother. I wish that I could fly down to Texas to hug some necks and bring a comforting casserole in a foil-covered 13x9 Pyrex. With Tiffany’s permission, I would like to share this beautiful picture of her and her mama back in the 1970s. Please keep my friend and her family in your thoughts and prayers.
I have been to a fair amount of white people funerals in Texas. There is always a meal. It is usually catered by the ladies of the departed’s local church.
Or it can be a solemn trip to Whataburger after my cousin’s funeral where we try not to talk about her overdose or the kids she left behind. We cannot tell any funny or heartwarming stories we had of her. Her death was too raw, too unnatural, too obscene. We are left with the smallest of small talk. Jarene’s sudden death robbed us of her and robbed us of our words. Hers was a short and sad life, but Jarene was a beautiful spirit who deserved more of everything good. I don’t believe in an afterlife, but I want more than anything for her to have a happy one. More than twenty years later, I cannot remember a single thing said at Jarene’s funeral, but I do remember where we ate afterwards. Memory is a strange thing.
There are certain foods that always make an appearance at Protestant white people funerals in Texas. There is a boneless, fully cooked ham sliced into half moons of salty goodness. I take a piece (or two if the spread looks anemic) and put it on my plate. There is always fried chicken from Popeye’s (preferable), Church’s (serviceable), or KFC (Girl, I guess), and very occasionally homemade (delicious but rarer than a hen’s tooth). If the rest of the buffet looks bountiful, I leave the chicken be. Unless it’s homemade, of course. Next is the inexplicable green salad with a bottle of Wishbone and a bottle of Hidden Valley in situ—I’m sure it’s fine, but it takes up valuable plate real estate. I might grab a little potato salad or macaroni salad, but only homemade—that shit from Sam’s ain’t gonna cut it. Next we have our “vegetables”—the macs and cheeses and a variety of sumptuous, sloppy dishes made with all manners of frozen potatoes with cream of something soups and enough melted cheddar or Colby cheese to choke a donkey. I try a bit of each of them. This is my comfort right here. Next are the meats that aren’t ham or fried chicken.
There may be baked chicken.
It exists.
There may be some ribs or brisket from Dickie’s or even one of the parishioner’s smokers. There are casseroles with meat and poultry in them, my favorites being turkey (or chicken) tetrazzini and King Ranch Casserole aka King Ranch Chicken. I could eat my weight in both of them, come back for seconds, and then do it all over again. I love those dishes. And they really do comfort my grieving heart. Earlier this week I made Jennifer and me some King Ranch Casserole, and it was so delicious and comforting on a snowy cold day. Here is my recipe:
King Ranch Casserole
by Jeremy D. Nichols
1 bell pepper
1 chopped onion
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 pound chopped cooked chicken
1 can cream of chicken soup
1 can cream of mushroom soup
1 can original or hot Ro-tel chiles and tomatoes, not drained
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 tsp garlic powder
salt and pepper to taste
cooking spray
12 corn tortillas, torn into 1-inch pieces
2 cups grated cheddar cheese
Preheat oven to 350F
Sauté the bell pepper and onion in the vegetable oil over medium heat until soft. About 5 minutes. Remove skillet from heat.
Add the chicken, soups, Ro-tel, and seasonings to the skillet and stir together until well incorporated.
Spray a 13x9 pyrex and cover the bottom of the pan with about ⅓ of the tortilla pieces. Top with ⅓ of chicken mixture and ⅔ cup of cheese. Layer again twice and then cover with remaining cheese. Cover with aluminum foil and place into 350F oven and bake for 30 minutes. The casserole should be bubbly, the cheese should be melted but not brown.
Remove foil and bake for 10-15 minutes until cheese is lightly golden brown.
Eat hearty!
For those of you that follow me on TikTok, you know that this was a hard week physically and mentally, but I really looked forward to writing my blog this week. Writing to you, my internet friends has been a really positive and fulfilling part of my life for the last couple of years. Thank you for pausing to honor my friend’s loss with me. She is a dear friend and a friend of this blog. I love her and I want her to know how many people love her too. Maybe when she gets back to Chicago, I can bring her a King Ranch Casserole to share with her husband. Y’all have a good weekend and hug the ones you love tightly. We are not promised even one more day with them.
Thank you, as always, for reading.
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I’ve not lived in Texas since the 1990s but still refer to king ranch casserole as Texas funeral casserole when I make it. Sending prayers for Debi and Tiffany.